elingregory: face surrounded by green and blue leaves (Default)
[personal profile] elingregory
And it's such a good feeling. Mind you this is the second draft and I may have to rewrite bits again once the betas have had their say. One of the things that concerns me is that the sex scenes, such as they are, are very mild. I suspect that the average reader wants their reading matter more squelchy, not something I'm comfortable writing.

BUT, it's done for the moment so i need to work on something else. Pirates? I should get the first draft of that done before starting the reading for my next nanowrimo. OTOH I have other stories closer to completion.

Decisions, decisions!

Anyhow, here's a celebratory snippet:



The rider sat with his chin on his fist and offered Philon the last piece of honeyed bread. "You work harder than I do," he said. "You need your energy."
"I can sleep some of the heat away, “Philon pointed out. “You have to exercise that unruly stallion."
"With the sun this high? No, let the beast sweat for a while," Hilarion said. "Do you know this game?" He pointed to a sprig of thyme and flicked the last drop of wine in his cup at it. “I missed!”
They topped up from the jug and passed the cup back and forth, sipping and taking it in turns to try to wet the tiny shoot. It was harder than it looked. They laughed, finishing the drink while the heat grew, until Philon felt his eyelids grow heavy again.
“Are you tired?” Hilarion’s voice was quiet and Philon glanced at him to catch him with that tension about his jaw that suggested he might be suppressing a yawn.
“Are you?” Philon asked.
Hilarion hesitated for a moment before smiling and getting to his feet. “I must go,” he said. “Thank you for the drink and the shade and the company. And for letting me see your work.”
Philon had stood too and looked at him, seeing again the warm interest in his eyes, the wistful smile that suggested a reluctance to leave. He realised that for the past hour he had been carefully seduced. That such a thing might happen at some time he had always known. Nikias had warned him to take care and remain modest and he had done so, but Hilarion did not seem the predatory type, had, in fact, seemed more interested in Philon's work than in Philon.
But so he would, Philon reminded himself, if he wished to impress you.

Date: 2011-08-01 06:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] essayel.livejournal.com
Thank you :D

*hugs* writing/life balance can be a bitch. I hope you find time again soon. It's such a good refuge from the RL chaos.

"Appropriate to the context" is key. For instance I couldn't imagine a move by move account of Jonty and Orlando 'doing their duty'. It just wouldn't be right! with contemporary characters otoh, a higher level of graphicness - um - graphicicity - squelchiness can be more appropriate, though it can get both ludicrous and boring if it goes on too long.

Date: 2011-08-01 09:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anteros-lmc.livejournal.com
"Appropriate to the context" is key.
*nods* I think the real trick is to be able to write scenes that are subtle and restrained but still highly erotic. Mmmm nice :)

it can get both ludicrous and boring if it goes on too long
Definitely. I've only come across a handful of writers, both in print and in fandom that can really sustain lengthy graphic sex scenes. More often than not all that anatomical detail just gets dull!

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